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This week Missouri residents learned they’ll get a newspaper, The Uranus Examiner, probably because The Colonoscopy and The Hemorrhoid didn’t include the town’s name. In Minnesota, firefighters used the jaws of life to free a bear from a milk can and Inver Grove police captured Billy the Kid, a runaway goat who had been on the lam for several days. But Ricky the Roo is on the loose in Mississippi, where he hopped away minutes after meeting his new owners. And a New York man bought a $6.7 million winning lottery ticket while stopping to buy a treat for his dog, while residents of Rabbit Hash, Kentucky mourned the death of their first female mayor, a collie named Lucy Lou. Should Uranus residents worry they’ll be the … butt … of jokes?

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