“There’s a fly in my soup,” Professor Plum said as he walked into the mail room.
He read the mail…. (More)
“Shh,” Chef whispered with a wink. “Everyone will want one.”
Professor Plum chuckled and left with Ms. Scarlet to join the resident faculty in the
wine cellar library, where they’ll spend the weekend drinking thinking on our motto of Magis vinum, magis verum (“More wine, more truth”).
In the staff poker game, there was a fly in the ointment for the
Professor of Astrology Janitor’s pocket Kings, in the Ace of Diamonds. The Professor of Astrology Janitor had opened by calling the big blind and, after Chef raised and the Squirrel called, putting in a pot-sized reraise. His opening gambit all but yelled “I have Aces or Kings!” and Chef folded, but the Squirrel called.
Professor of Astrology Janitor was pretty sure the Squirrel had either Ace-King or another big pair, such as Queens. So when the Squirrel checked after the Ace of Diamonds fell with the Nine of Clubs and Four of Spades on the flop, the Professor of Astrology Janitor offered only a half-pot-sized bet. And sure enough, the Squirrel nudged in a pot-sized reraise, a bet that all but yelled “I have Ace-King, that is: a pair of Aces and one of your two outs!”
Or, perhaps, pocket Nines for three of a kind.
Either way, something more than the
Professor of Astrology Janitor’s pair of Kings.
Professor of Astrology Janitor tossed his Kings into the muck and began his plaintive mewling. Chef went to the kitchen to make Bacon-and-Egg Soup, leaving your lowly mail room clerk to review the week’s correspondence….
Dear Ms. Crissie,
Waiter! There was a spy in my soup!
The President of the United States, Chief Executive, Commander in Chief, and Leader of the Free World
We would applaud you for noticing, if by “spy” you meant the many Russian intelligence agents with ties to your campaign. Alas, you seem to mean Stefan Halper, the American-born retired Cambridge professor and occasional U.S. intelligence informant. The FBI asked Halper to chat with Carter Page and George Papadopoulos, two of your advisors, about reports that Russian spies had contacted them. That is, the FBI were investigating the Russian’s suspicious activity. It was a routine FBI counterintelligence operation, not some nefarious ‘deep state’ conspiracy ordered by President Obama to undermine your campaign.
We conclude that there were plenty of spies in your soup … and you seem to think the rest of us shouldn’t find out about that. But we have, and we will continue to find out more as – to stretch the entomological metaphor – more maggots crawl out of the woodwork under the spray of special counsel Robert Mueller’s legal Raid.
Dear Ms. Crissie,
Didn’t you mean raids, lower-case and plural? Oh, you meant the bug spray.
Anyway, does Chef really put flies in her Bacon-and-Egg Soup?
Bugging You for Breakfast in Blogistan
P.S.: Your fly is down.
No, Chef uses the fly-free Food Network recipe for Bacon-and-Egg soup, at the link below. Bon appétit!
P.S.: We are wearing shorts with an elastic waistband, so we have no fly to be down. But thank you for adding another fly joke.
Photo Credit: David Becker (Getty Images)