“When the Squirrel says he didn’t eat those macadamias,” Professor Plum said as he walked into the mail room, “he means it.”

He read the mail…. (More)

The Squirrel tapped at his Blewberry: “Actually, I didn’t say that.”

Professor Plum nodded and left with Ms. Scarlet to join the resident faculty in the wine cellar library, where they’ll spend the weekend drinking thinking on our motto of Magis vinum, magis verum (“More wine, more truth”).

In the staff poker game, the Professor of Astrology Janitor did mean it when he opened by raising with a pair of red Queens. The Squirrel apparently believed him and folded, but Chef called.

The flop brought the Ace of Clubs, Seven of Diamonds, and Six of Spades. Chef checked and the Professor of Astrology Janitor offered a pot-sized bet. Again, Chef called.

The Professor of Astrology Janitor thought Chef might have an Ace, and the Nine of Hearts on the turn brought a possible straight into play. Chef checked and this time the Professor of Astrology Janitor checked behind.

The Ten of Clubs fell on the river. Now Chef led with a half-pot-sized bet. She needed only an Eight for a Ten-high straight, or any Ace to beat the Professor of Astrology Janitor’s pair of Queens. And from the way she’d played the pot, he saw no choice. He tossed his Queens in the muck.

Chef didn’t show her cards, and the Professor of Astrology Janitor began his plaintive mewling. Chef went to the kitchen to make an Apple-Macadamia Crisp, leaving your lowly mail room clerk to review the week’s correspondence….

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Dear Ms. Crissie,

Vladimir Putin said he absolutely did not meddle in our election. He did not do what they are saying he did. Every time he sees me, he said: ‘I didn’t do that.’ And I believe, I really believe that when he tells me that, he means it.

The President of the United States, Chief Executive, Commander in Chief, and Leader of the Free World

Dear God-King,

Your CIA director disagrees:

The Director stands by and has always stood by the January 2017 Intelligence Community Assessment entitled: Assessing Russian Activities and Intentions in Recent U.S. Elections. The intelligence assessment with regard to Russian election meddling has not changed.

Facebook has admitted that Russian “troll farms” spent over $100,000 on political ads and a peer-reviewed analysis found that 1-in-5 tweets about the election were sent by Twitter bots, many of them hosted in Russia. Indeed there’s ample public evidence that points to Russian meddling in the 2016 election and “a growing mountain of circumstantial evidence” that your campaign knew about and/or took part in that meddling.

We conclude that you claim to believe Putin because the alternative is to publicly admit that you benefited from a Russian propaganda campaign.

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Dear Ms. Crissie,

Apples and macadamias? Umm, how does Chef make that crisp thingy, and is it ready yet?

Eager for Breakfast in Blogistan

Dear Squirrel,

Chef notes that she set out a bowl of apple chunks and macadamias for you and your family, because the Apple-Macadamia Crisp is too sweet for squirrels. She used the recipe at the link below. Bon appétit!

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Image Credits — Trump Putin Meeting: AP; Smoke, Oil Effects: Crissie Brown (BPICampus.com)

God-King; your CIA director disagrees; Russian “troll farms”; 1-in-5 election tweets sent by Twitter bots; a mountain of public evidence; “a growing mountain of circumstantial evidence”.

Apple-Macadamia Crisp.

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Happy Sunday!