“The resident faculty didn’t elect me as chair,” Professor Plum said as he entered the mail room. “Clearly, they didn’t learn their lesson.”

He read the mail…. (More)

“I didn’t realize the resident faculty had a chair,” Chef said.

Professor Plum pretended to be aghast. “What, you think we sit on the floor?”

The Squirrel tapped his Blewberry and a stock comedy rimshot rang out. Professor Plum then left with Ms. Scarlet to join the resident faculty in the wine cellar library, where they’ll spend the weekend drinking thinking on our motto of Magis vinum, magis verum (“More wine, more truth”). While sitting on chairs.

In the staff poker game, the Professor of Astrology Janitor learned his lesson after overplaying a pair of Nines against the Squirrel’s pocket Kings. So when Chef and the Squirrel merely called his big blind, he peeked at a pair of red Sevens and simply tapped the table.

The flop brought the Eight of Hearts, Seven of Clubs, and Three of Spades. The Squirrel checked and the Professor of Astrology Janitor put in a minimum bet. Chef shrugged and folded. The Squirrel took another look at his cards and pushed them into the muck as well.

“Lousy flop for Ace-Jack,” the Squirrel texted.

Chef chuckled. “I guess there were only two Aces and Jacks left in the deck.”

The Professor of Astrology Janitor began his plaintive mewling as he scooped in the tiny pot for his three Sevens. Chef went to the kitchen to make Brainy Breakfast Egg Sandwiches, leaving your lowly mail room clerk to review the week’s correspondence….


Dear Ms. Crissie,

Electing Tom Perez to chair the Democratic National Committee shows that the Democratic Party didn’t learn their lesson. They are not going to be in touch with the people and they are not ready to move in a new direction despite the rhetoric. The winds of change cannot quickly come through the DNC. Maybe that’s intentional. They’re going to fight us tooth and nail. The leaders of the Democratic Party missed an opportunity today. This vote may sting for progressives, particularly young people. They’re trying to burn the left again. There’d be no good reason to say, “Hey, the Democratic Party cares about Bernie Sanders’s primary voters.” There’s going to be a silent undercurrent that will stay away because they’ll feel their voices were not heard. What do you call it when you do the same thing over and over again and expect different results? Oh yeah: the Democratic Party.

Alexa, Adam, Jean, Dan, Krupesh, Scott, Denise, and Naomi in Left Blogistan

Dear Alexa, Adam, Jean, Dan, Krupesh, Scott, Denise, and Naomi,

We applaud your support for progressive issues. We also note that, as a consumer advocate, Assistant Attorney General for the DOJ’s Civil Rights Division, and then Secretary of Labor, Tom Perez championed those same issues, as Yastreblyansky of No More Mister Nice Blog explains:

I’m so old (as we say on the Twitter) I remember when the self-denominated progressive faction was looking on Labor Secretary Tom Perez as a kind of savior against those terrible corporate Democrats, maybe ten months ago—when somebody was talking him up as a vice presidential candidate for Hillary Clinton. Didn’t work out, but that’s another story. But Perez did have a very progressive reputation: “The most radical cabinet secretary since Henry Wallace headed agriculture,” howled Breitbart before he’d even been confirmed. Bankers hated him for fighting racial discrimination in housing mortgages at the Department of Justice, and the representatives of capital (such as Sam Batman writing for The Hill) for his work at Labor.
So it’s been strange to watch in his contest against Rep. Keith Ellison for the chairmanship of the Democratic National Committee how he’s been treated by some members of that same self-denominated progressive faction as a reactionary and a plutocrat, Matt Stoller at The Intercept actually denouncing him for his “bank-friendly record” (in winning a case against banks that had unlawfully foreclosed against veterans Perez only won a judgment of $123 million without putting anybody in jail, including Steven Mnuchin, now Donald Trump’s treasury secretary, so I’m sure those veterans will never forgive him for merely getting them their money back), and others mysteriously claiming he might be under the malignant influence of the “centrist” or Liebermanian or plutocratist DLC, or Democratic Leadership Council—apparently unaware that that organization expired, unlamented, in 2011, and had very little influence for some time before that.

We also note that Rep. Ellison immediately accepted Perez’s offer to serve as vice-chair, adding: “If they trust me, they need to come on and trust Tom Perez too.”

We also think they need to be more active in their local Democratic Party groups and work to build relationships among issue groups, rather than merely shouting slogans, as renowned union organizer Marshall Ganz explained:

Many Democrats confuse messaging with educating, marketing with organizing. They think it is all about branding when it is really about relational work. You engage people with each other, creating collective capacity. That’s how you sustain and grow and get leadership. That’s how you make things happen. Organizers have known this for years.

Finally, we note that Perez is the son of Dominican immigrants, that his father died when he was 12, that he worked as a garbage collector to pay his tuition at Brown University, where he earned acceptance into Harvard Law School and went on to become the first lawyer in his family.

This leaves us to wonder: when did succeeding in the face of hardship – and then using one’s personal success to advocate for consumers, civil rights, and workers’ rights – become “out of touch?”


Dear Ms. Crissie,

It sounds like many of us have a lot to learn about, and from, Tom Perez. Will Chef’s Brainy Breakfast Egg Sandwiches help us remember it all?

Hoping to Be Brainier in Blogistan

Dear Hoping to Be Brainier,

Chef says numerous studies show that a nutritious breakfast makes it easier to learn, and the Brainy Breakfast Egg Sandwich is loaded with protein, complex carbohydrates, and antioxidants that improve brain health. To make it, simply fry an egg in olive oil and place it on a toasted English Muffin with a slice of Swiss cheese, a slice of tomato, and 3 baby spinach leaves. Chef serves it with a small, sliced apple. Bon appétit!


Photo Credit: CNN

Alexa, Adam, Jean, DanKrupesh, Scott, DeniseNaomi in Left Blogistan; consumer advocate, Assistant Attorney General for the DOJ’s Civil Rights Division, Secretary of Labor; Yastreblyansky of No More Mister Nice Blog; renowned union organizer Marshall Ganz; Perez father died when he was 12; worked as a garbage collector to pay his tuition at Brown University.

Brainy Breakfast Egg Sandwich.


Happy Sunday!