“Abracowabunga,” Professor Plum said as he walked into the mail room. “Isn’t that the magic word?”

He read the mail…. (More)

Professor Plum left with Ms. Scarlet to join the resident faculty in the wine cellar library, where they’ll spend the weekend drinking thinking on our motto of Magis vinum, magis verum (“More wine, more truth”).

In the staff poker game, the Professor of Astrology Janitor wondered what the magic words were. He first tried “Raise” after he peeked at his Ace and Jack of Clubs, but Chef called. When the flop brought the Ace of Hearts and the Jack and Six of Spades, the Professor of Astrology Janitor tried “Bet,” but again Chef called. So he tried “Check” after the Nine of Spades fell on the turn, and then Chef offered her own magic words: “All-in.”

Did Chef have two Spades in-hand for a flush? Or was she bluffing? The Professor of Astrology Janitor thought for a long moment and decided to use a different magic word: “Fold.”

“I knew you weren’t drawing to Spades,” Chef said as she flashed a pair of Nines for three-of-a-kind, “or you would have checked the flop. And I couldn’t give you a free draw at a full house.”

The Professor of Astrology Janitor began his plaintive mewling and Chef went to the kitchen to make a French Toast Soufflé, leaving your lowly mail room clerk to review the week’s correspondence….

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Dear Ms. Crissie,

We are outraged – outraged we say! – that Hillary Clinton refused to say the U.S. is at war with “radical Islam” or “Islamic terrorism.” How can she keep America safe if she won’t say those words?

Rick in PA, Jeb in FL, Mike in AR, Donald in NY, Carly in NY, and John in OH

Dear Rick, Jeb, Mike, Donald, Carly, and John,

We understand your childlike faith in magic words. However, we note that Clinton did say the U.S. is at war with “terrorism.” We further note not all Muslims are terrorists and, equally important, not all terrorists are Muslims. Indeed since 9/11 terrorists driven by white supremacy and/or anti-government fanaticism have killed almost twice as many people in the U.S. as have Muslims. We conclude that your demand for magic words like “radical Islam” or “Islamic terrorists” is an appeal to tribalism and what David Wong calls Team Violence … the same mindset that fueled the carnage in Paris this week.

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Dear Ms. Crissie,

Is Chef’s French Toast Soufflé a tribute to the wonderful people of Paris? Also, how do I make it?

Tres Hungry in Blogistan

Dear Tres Hungry,

Yes, Chef’s French Toast Soufflé is dedicated to the wonderful people of Paris. To make it, first spread 10 cups of 1″ square bread cubes in a lightly-greased 9×13 baking dish. Next beat 8 ounces of softened cream cheese in a mixer until smooth, then add 8 large eggs, one at a time, ensuring that each is fully blended. Add 1½ cup of 2% milk, ⅔ cup half-and-half, ½ cup of maple syrup, and ½ teaspoon of vanilla extract, and mix until smooth. Pour the cream cheese mixture over the bread, then cover and refrigerate overnight. Remove it from the refrigerator in the morning and let it stand for 30 minutes, then bake at 375° for 50 minutes, or until set. Chef sprinkles hers with confectioner’s sugar, but you may prefer to serve it with maple syrup. Bon appétit!

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Photo Credit: Charlie Neibergall (AP)

Sources:

Rick in PA, Jeb in FL, Mike in AR, Donald in NY, Carly in NY, and John in OH; since 9/11 terrorists driven by white supremacy and/or anti-government fanaticism have killed almost twice as many people in the U.S. as have Muslims; an appeal to tribalism and what David Wong calls Team Violence.

French Toast Soufflé.

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Happy Sunday!