Newt Gingrich won’t run for Speaker of the House, but he offered to be drafted. You know, like George Washington. And Joe Biden still isn’t running for president yet…. (More)

“This is why George Washington came out of retirement”

Sean Hannity asked Newt Gingrich if he would run for Speaker of the House … and received a classic, Gingritchean reply:

I’m not laughing at it. I’m saying to you – I’m trying to be totally honest with you. If you were to say to me 218 have called you up and given you their pledge, obviously no citizen could ever turn down that kind of challenge. This is why George Washington came out of retirement – because there are moments you can’t avoid.”

Yes, the George Washington with the Monument. The one on Mount Rushmore. The one on the dollar bill. The one with a U.S. state and 25 cities including our nation’s capital named after him. That George Washington.

It’s hardly the first time Gingrich has reckoned himself an epic historical figure:

Still, Gingrich the Grandiloquent sneaked through. Asked about his stated resolve to rein in federal courts, he said that “just like Jefferson, Jackson, Lincoln and F.D.R., I would be prepared to take on the judiciary.” The company he keeps!

Over the years he has directly or indirectly compared himself to Moses, William Wallace (aka “Braveheart,” thanks to Mel Gibson), the Duke of Wellington, Charles de Gaulle and, repeatedly, Ronald Reagan, as when he recently said, “Because I am much like Reagan and Margaret Thatcher, I’m such an unconventional political figure that you really need to design a unique campaign that fits the way I operate.”

Consider the hand-written easel presentation he offered to supporters in 1992:

Gingrich – primary mission

Advocate of civilization
Definer of civilization
Teacher of the Rules of Civilization
Arouser of those who Fan Civilization
Organizer of the pro-civilization activists
Leader (Possibly) of the civilizing forces

He told Hannity “it’s not about personality.” As. If. Fact is, Gingrich is a case study in humble-brag. Without the “humble.”

“There are other options, too”

I get that no one knows who House Republicans will turn to after Kevin McCarthy withdrew yesterday. But Gingrich? At least Ed Kilgore offers some other candidates:

But if you’re going to think “outside the box” for a House Speaker, there are other options, too:

Speaker Carly Fiorina would finally have that missing item on her resume – you know, remotely relevant qualifications for the presidency – and could symbolize the fact that just because the House GOP is trying to shut down Planned Parenthood and opposes pay equity is no reason to assume there’s any “war on women” going on.

Speaker Bobby Jindal could draw on his past House experience, and he’d have an excuse to leave Louisiana for good!

Speaker Sean Hannity could cut out the middle-men in Fox News/GOP message communications.

Speaker David Koch could cut out the middle-men, period.

So many options! Who else can you think of, dear readers?

One of Kilgore’s readers suggests an animal, like Caligula’s horse. That makes sense to me. At least that way House Republicans have both ends of a horse….

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“The most significant sign the source had seen”

And speaking of ancient auguries, Ryan Lizza offers this Delphic whisper:

Joe Biden has taken another step toward entering the Presidential race.

Representatives of the Vice-President held a meeting this week with Democratic National Committee staffers. They briefed Biden’s aides on arcane but crucial rules that the Vice-President would need to understand if he decides to run, according to a D.N.C. official.

It was the most significant sign the source had seen to indicate Biden’s intentions. “I think it means he’s running,” the source said.

I meditated over an empty macadamia shell – hey, it’s hard to meditate on an empty stomach – and I agree with Greg Sargent:

Mr. Vice President, enough is enough. The first Democratic presidential debate is in five days. Tell us what you’re going to do already.

Sargent surveys Biden’s admirable qualities, and there are many, then cautions:

But the game Joe Biden is playing now, in holding back on making his decision and telling us what he plans to do, just has to end, and fast. At best it’s becoming a farcical distraction that is beneath him. At worst it’s becoming a serious waste of our time.

I’d raise a macadamia to that, but I ate it already.

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Photo Credit: Reuters

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Good day and good nuts