“I hope Chef is making bull soup for breakfast,” Professor Plum announced as he walked into the mail room. She isn’t, but he read the mail. (More)

Ms. Scarlet took Professor Plum’s hand and they left to join the resident faculty in the wine cellar library, where they’ll spend the weekend thinking drinking on our motto of Magis vinum, magis verum (“More wine, more truth”).

In the staff poker game, the Professor of Astrology Janitor was stewing over a pair of black Fives. Chef had opened the pot with a raise, and the Professor of Astrology Janitor called. The flop brought the Queen and Six of Hearts and the Five of Diamonds, giving him three-of-a-kind. He checked and Chef bet half the pot. Fearing she might have two Hearts and not wanting to allow her a cheap draw at a flush, the Professor of Astrology Janitor pushed in a pot-sized raise. Chef paused for a long moment and called. The Queen of Clubs on the turn gave him a full house and, no longer fearing a flush draw, the Professor of Astrology Janitor offered a small bet. Again Chef paused for a long moment, and again she called. The Nine of Spades fell on the river and the Professor of Astrology Janitor checked.

“I’m all in,” Chef calmly announced as she pushed in the rest of her chips.

Had she opened with a suited Seven and Eight, perhaps of Hearts, and had now made a Nine-high straight? If so, his full house was a winner, but she would know that he would not call without at least a straight, so that seemed unlikely. Did she have a pair of Sixes or Nines, for a bigger full house? Again, that didn’t fit her play. The Professor of Astrology Janitor simmered and stewed and decided he had to call. Chef turned over her two Queens for four-of-a-kind, and the Professor of Astrology Janitor began his plaintive mewling. Chef went to the kitchen to make Bacon-and-Egg Breakfast Soup, leaving your lowly mail room clerk to review the week’s correspondence….


Dear Ms. Crissie,

Some people are upset that I said “bull soup” during a meeting of Senate Republicans this week, in response to conservative demands for uncompromising obstruction. What I did was not in a vacuum and I’m glad to be able to be in a position where I can do things that are for the greater good of the Republican Conference, the U.S. Senate, and ultimately, candidly, for the country.

Bob in TN

Dear Bob,

We applaud your willingness to stand up to the obstructionist wing of your party and join with other Senate Republican colleagues to confirm President Obama’s executive branch nominees.


Dear Ms. Crissie,

I’m from Texas and I want to talk about breeding. American patriots came those incredible blood lines of Thomas Jefferson and George Washington and John Smith. And all these great Americans, Martin Luther King. These great Americans who built this country. You came from them. And the unique thing about being from that part of the world, when you learn about breeding, you learn that you cannot breed Secretariat to a donkey and expect to win the Kentucky Derby. You guys have incredible DNA and don’t forget it. We are Americans. You guys come from the best stock on planet Earth. There’s never been a nation that has had the DNA for resiliency and commitment and devotion as Americans do to their country. You’ve got the breeding, you’ve got the DNA, you’ve got the patriotism, and you’ve got the sacrifice, and I’ll be damned if I’m going to give my country up to a bunch of people who do not deserve to be here.

As Bill Pullman said, anybody who’s watched the movie Independence Day, which happens to be one of my favorite movies, by the way, he’s addressing the pilots fixing to go up against the alien mother ship, and this is one of my favorite lines. “We will not go quietly into the night.” We are Americans and we are defending our soil. We will not lay down for a bunch of political geniuses to give away the nation that we have defended for 237 years.

Ken in IA

Dear Ken,

Given your claims of expertise on breeding, we find it odd that you forgot to mention that all of the Americans you mentioned brought DNA from somewhere else. Our nation was founded and built by immigrants, many of whom came here without legal documentation. We also feel compelled to note that many of the ancestors of the conservatives you honor, including many of your beloved Texans, have not been defending our nation for 237 years. Indeed 150 years ago they had renounced our nation and were fighting for the Confederacy. Finally, we feel compelled to note that Bill Pullman’s character in Independence Day was not speaking for Americans but for all humanity, and was paraphrasing the famous words of Welsh poet Dylan Thomas. In conclusion, we suggest there is a fine line between well bred … and inbred.


Dear Ms. Crissie,

Bob in TN didn’t really say “bull soup,” did he? Also, how do I make Chef’s Bacon-and-Egg Breakfast soup?

Bullish on Breakfast in Blogistan

Dear Bullish on Breakfast,

We concede that we paraphrased Bob in TN, as this is a family-friendly forum.

As for Chef’s Bacon-and-Egg Breakfast soup, first cut ½ pound of bacon into ¼-inch cubes and cook in a medium pot over medium heat for about 7 minutes, until the bacon is crisp. While the bacon is cooking, cut 4 slices of Italian bread into ½-inch cubes, toss together in 2 Tablespoons of extra virgin olive oil, season with salt and pepper, and bake at 350°F for 8 minutes, until crisp and golden brown. Use a slotted spoon to scoop the bacon onto a paper towel to drain, and pour out all but 2 Tablespoons of the drippings.

Cook 2 cloves of crushed garlic in the bacon drippings for 1-2 minutes, until fragrant and lightly golden, then add 3 cups of chicken broth, 1½ cups of water, 1 small piece of Parmesan rind, and 4 Tablespoons of freshly chopped parsley. Cover and bring to a boil, then reduce heat and simmer for 10 minutes.

Reduce the heat again, until the soup is barely boiling, then crack one egg into a bowl, gently slip it into the soup, and repeat with another egg. Poach the eggs for 2 minutes, until just set, and use a slotted spoon to scoop each egg into a soup bowl.

Stir 1 cup of grated Parmesan cheese into the soup, along with 2 Tablespoons of freshly chopped parsley, and season to taste with salt and pepper. Ladle the soup over the egg in each bowl, and top with the bacon, croutons, and ¼ of grated Parmesan cheese. Bon appétit!



Bob in TN.

Ken in IA; famous words of Welsh poet Dylan Thomas.


Happy Sunday!