The resident faculty left instructions for making donuts outside the mail room door this morning. We hope it was a clue…. (More)

First our thanks to last week’s writers:

On Monday, addisnana offered Christmas Memories in Midday Matinee and winterbanyan reported on how Environmental Changes Impact Biodiversity in Our Earth.

On Tuesday, Winning Progressive reminded us that No, Sharia Law Is Not Being Imposed in the U.S. in Morning Feature, the Squirrel put Ron Paul in the Spotlight in Furthermore!, readers collaborated on Tuesday’s Tale: What Thing? in Midday Matinee, and winterbanyan debunked myths about Poverty and National Parks in Our Earth.

On Wednesday, Winning Progressive noted that Action to Overturn Citizens United Heats Up in Morning Feature and offered a midweek Weekend Reading in Furthermore!, addisnana mused on Windshield Wipers in Midday Matinee, we asked if employers are Entitled to Employees? in Evening Focus, and winterbanyan shared the Key Results of Durban Climate Conference in Our Earth.

On Thursday, we began a series on myth-making by asking if Kwanzaa is A ‘Made Up’ Holiday? in Morning Feature, and winterbanyan reported on the EPA’s new Mercury and Toxic Air Standards in Our Earth.

On Friday, we continued the series on myth-making with Social Media and the Myth Olympics in Morning Feature, and winterbanyan found more positive environmental news in Birds Thought Extinct Return in Our Earth.

On the weekend, we concludes the series on myth-making with New Year’s Eve Myths in Saturday’s Morning Feature, Ms. Crissie was asked to wish us Happy Shhhh? in Sunday’s Morning Feature, Winning Progressive shared Weekend Reading in Furthermore!, and winterbanyan brought our Eco News Roundup in Our Earth.

Note: Please share your stories of offline activism in Things We Did This Week.

Thus we return to the instructions for making donuts, left outside the mail room door as the resident faculty went from the wine cellar library where they spent the weekend drinking thinking on our motto of Magis vinum, magis verum (“More wine, more truth”) to the hot tub faculty lounge for their weekly game where the underwear goes flying planning conference.

At first the staff thought this might signal a change in the resident faculty’s breakfast preferences. Chef is not a baker, and their donut-making instructions consisted only of a link to a video, but she sometimes finds good recipes and tips in videos. Alas, she found only this:

Chef takes pride in her breakfasts, and began grumbling that she would not buy chain store pastry for the campus cafeteria. “There are limits, even for the faculty,” she announced with a huff.

Just then the Squirrel walked in, late and a bit grumpy. He pulled out his Blewberry and texted: “Holidays over. Sigh. Time to get back to researching my thesis.”

The Professor of Astrology Janitor clapped his hands sharply. “That’s the clue!”

Pootie the Precious jumped from the poker table, where she was sniffing the Squirrel’s bowl of macadamias, and dashed under the mail room clerk’s chair. She then pulled out her iHazPhone and texted “Y da lowd noyz?”

The Squirrel texted back that the Professor of Astrology Janitor had just had “a eureka moment,” which required explanation as Pootie the Precious did not know the story of Archimedes. The explanation also required explanation, as Pootie the Precious noted that the Professor of Astrology had not just settled into a bath, nor dashed into the street without clothing or even fur (a fact for which we were all grateful). Pootie the Precious, living up to her feline reputation for curiosity, then asked why humans don’t have fur and need clothes.

Many explanations (and explanations of explanations) later, we think the staff agreed that this week the resident faculty will discuss enthusiasm and the urgency of starting work now to help Democrats win in 2012.

If not, we lost track of an explanation somewhere.


Happy Monday!