HEMMED In – My lobbyist is OK, Yours is NOT
Today’s output from Blogistan Polytechnic Institute’s state-of-the-art HEMMED (High-Energy Meta Mojo Elucidation Detector) machine is a load of manure.
I was all ready to write about biomass and manure today but then a different kind of manure caught my eye (metaphorically speaking only … thanks for worrying).
It is this manure:
“my lobbyist is a brilliant guy who ‘knows his way around Washington’”
“your lobbyist is a despicable crony and ‘a Washington insider’“
And this load of manure is being peddled by the tea party-elected Republicans of the 112th Congress.
The tea party Republicans ran on a platform of changing the way Washington does business. Out with the vested interests! In with the pure of heart!
Let me peer down into the rabbit hole of the Tea Party. Yikes!
Ron Johnson (R-WI) ran against those Washington interests and Russ Feingold. Remember this?
“After promising voters that he would reform the culture of lobbying in Washington, instead Senator Feingold embraced lobbyists and declared himself to be on their side,” a Johnson spokeswoman said [during the campaign].
Brings a star-spangled tear to my eyes.
Of course, then he turned around and hired lobbyist Don Kent as his chief of staff. When asked about this seeming contradiction, his response was “I hired him for his organizational skills, for his ability to identify people of intelligence and integrity to staff my Senate office, and so far he is doing a phenomenal job.”
Contradiction is not a word in the tea party lexicon because contradiction requires that you first have a body of knowledge to run counter to. The best I can determine is that the tea party has no visible body of knowledge therefore they do not have to worry about anything they say. (Note to self: This is a brilliant strategy and one that Lewis Carroll would admire).
Tea party Senator Mike Lee (R-UT) was selected by Utah Republicans at their state convention over “Washington insider” former Senator Bob Bennett. And who has Senator Lee chosen for his Chief of Staff? An energy lobbyist!! But that is just fine because he is a “brilliant guy” and Senator Lee needs someone like him because, as he said, “[Spencer] understands Washington politics and I need a man like that to help me in Washington”.
Senator Rand Paul (R-KY) hired anti-union lobbyist Douglas Stafford to his senate staff. Jesse Benton, Paul’s campaign manager, said that Stafford “is not a lobbyist in the sense that people think,” because he worked for a conservative advocacy group, the National Right to Work Committee. His stint included guiding the group’s campaign against “card check” legislation favored by unions, Benton said.
Ha ha ha ha ha. They are even trying to redefine what “lobbyist” means! He was simply “advocating” for a policy and “guiding” it not “lobbying” for it. See the difference? Darned persnickety liberals and their darned persnickety Dictionaries.
Rep. Charlie Bass of New Hampshire named food industry lobbyist John W. Billings as his chief of staff. “Congressman Bass demands all staff adhere to all House rules and ethics guidelines,” said Bass spokesman Scott Tranchemontagne. He added that Billings, who has lobbied for the Food Marketing Institute since 2006, “will lead by example.”
Ha ha ha ha ha. Yes, lead by example. Sorry, Charlie, but we already have plenty of examples of that kind of “leadership” (See “Johnson, Ron”; “Paul, Rand”; “Lee, Mike”).
It is that peculiar phenomonen known as IOKIYAR Its OKay If You’re A Republican. All standards of hypocrisy are suspended when you are a Republican simply Because. It really needs no further explanation. And, please, don’t be pointing it out any more, it makes the tea party activists upset.
I’ll write about the more helpful kind of manure after I dig myself out from under this pile.
Happy Tuesday to everyone and fist bumps!
The BPI Campus Progressive agenda:
1. People matter more than profits.
2. The earth is our home, not our trash can.
3. We need good government for both #1 and #2.
Return to HEMMED In three days a week on Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday for more output from BPI’s state-of-the-art HEMMED (High-Energy Meta Mojo Elucidation Detector) machine.
You can follow HEMMED In on twitter at JanF at BPICampus.
I know…I know. Republican hypocrisy is old news. IOKIYAR is old news.
But running as anti-Washington-insider and then hiring Washingon insiders to help you get around in Washington? It is head-spinningly mind-numbingly standing-English-on-its-head crazy.
With that big a pile, what I want to know is:
Seriously I laughed out loud several times. I hope many, many Democrats point out that reforming government for Republicans means that they are once again taking care of corporate America and all other promises were simply a way to get votes from the tea party voters who maybe thought that reform meant something else.
I thought it was Rainbows and Unicorns. Nothing too good for the tea party
y’know… i got nuthin. there’s just nothing i can say. When my youngest is out of college, I’m putting these books to work.
Ha. Very funny. How far abroad do you have to go? I always thought about Canada.
Lemme practice. “I thought aboot Canada. Eh”.
The Canadian government has a web site devoted to answering questions about wanting to live there and become a citizen. Younger is better for wanting to go to Canada.
i’m investigating. Australia, maybe; Costa Rica, maybe; Argentina or Chile. Austria’s a possibility.
Might not be the best time to go to Australia:
Costa Rica, I think, somewhere close by the University for Peace .
I have spent the last few days running away from home……didn’t leave the sofa, but my mind traveled far……
Thanks Jan
Also, the problem is the lobbyists are the ones who know what’s going on because they have been there for so long either as staff or as lobbyists. It is unfortunate that people voted for rich people and corporations only instead of for themselves. Better messaging = lying = small turnout = wins. Of course they don’t care as long as they have a job and take care of their corporate masters. People of Kentucky, Rand Paul doesn’t work for you. His staff member believes in slavery. That is the real word for “right to work” aka right to work for peanuts, right to be underpaid. That is what Mom, apple pie and the American flag are about stealing money from people who do the real work.
Thanks so much, Jan. I needed a way to laugh about this, and you gave it to me.
Brilliant Hemmed In. I will be looking at it again, every time I start to get angry about this particular political two-step. Laughter is always better than anger, and your humorous skewer is sharp indeed.